This little piggy had all the snacks! I’ve been trying to write this blog for a good few days now, but it’s now time to hang my head in shame and face facts. If I don’t stop snacking all the live long day, I will be back to October 1st, 2019! Hugely overweight, rounder and massively disappointed in myself.
Two weeks ago today, life was relatively normal. I left the house to go to work, took my daughter to my childcare heroes, I went shopping without having a mini heart attack if I heard someone coughing! I was trying to get back on track again after falling off the wagon whilst Denise was on her holiday. I had a fat freeze on my upper and lower stomach, I was 100% committed again. Then day by day, life has changed, places closed, schools closed, Denise took the difficult decision to close and then Boris ordered a lock down. I will admit, I didn’t take it very well and since then I feel like I am spiralling out of control. Both my partner and I are working from home, with a 2-year old in tow. Like all of us, we can’t leave the house without good reason unless it’s for an hour of exercise or a trip to buy essentials (which feels like a mini break). The snaccidents are now a three times daily occurrence – sometimes it’s a biscuit, sometimes it’s an Easter egg!
I am struggling! I am struggling to find motivation, to stay positive about anything, and above all to stay sane! This “new way of life” we all find ourselves in is just so far from my normal. I mean I am far from a social butterfly, but I am so badly craving human interaction from people outside of my household. I know there is absolutely nothing I can do about it, I know that many people have it so much worse than me (those self-isolating, those shielding due to being high-risk, those preparing for experiences nobody should have to do alone) but knowing this doesn’t make me feel any more positive about life right now.
I sat last night, feeling pretty lonely and miserable, in my new size 16 pyjamas (I was a size 18/20 before starting this journey) and realised if I don’t get my act together pretty soon, I will be digging out all of the clothes that were too big for me that I haven’t yet donated to charity.
I’ve decided today that enough is enough. I was so miserable last night thinking about how far I have come and how easy it would be to fall back into the old habits. This little piggy needs to take control.
Today will be the day that this little piggy takes a stand! I will form back the habits I have worked so hard to form over the last 4/5 months. I will start drinking 2 litres of water per day. I will stay within my 1700 calories, I may see what all the fuss is about and do Joe Wicks’s PE Lesson and I will use my hour “release” to exercise. So to make myself accountable to all of this, I will be writing this blog every Monday from now until I am allowed to see Denise again and I will be telling all of you about my week, if I have stuck to plan and I might even treat you to a look of my food diary for the week.
She’s checking up on me….
Sorry, supporting me! I might not be able to get into the treatment room to be “told off” for being a little piggy but Denise has started to do video consultations, which I will be taking advantage of! Another avenue of accountability in a world where I could really could continue with the attitude “I might as well eat this entire share bag of Dorito’s and 17kg of chocolate because nobody can see me in lock down”.
For next week, where I will be sharing my progress from the week, including my food diary and the exercise I have done. I’m going to use my next essential shop (this afternoon) to buy batteries for my scales too so I can see just how much damage I have done to the progress I have made so far!
If you are reading this blog post for the first time and are thinking “what the hell is this journey she is talking about?” then go back to the Blog page where you can read from the beginning.